Catching Up

oh.em.GEE. It has been SO LONG. SMH. I'm SORRY. It's just that I've been SO BUSY. Like it has honestly been something going on EVERYDAY. But now that I have a little free time, I'm gonna catch you all up on what's been going on with me. (Of course this will be the SHORT version.) El.oh.el. SO...hmmm....WHERE DO I START??? Well...OKAY. I went through some trials of FAITH *sighs* For those people that DON'T know, I'm big on signs and that sort of stuff. I mean...I believe GOD talks us to us through signs. We just have to recognize them. ANYWAYZ. My friend and I were going through  something and we were frustrated by obstacles that we had to go through. SMH. What's life without obstacles??? El.oh.el. Well...like any other person, we started to get concerned and tried to take it upon ourselves to solve the problem. But when we thought time was over for us, GOD swooped in and saved us. *pauses* Isn't HE GREAT??? :-)  That just proved that I have to have more faith and let GOD do what HE does. He comes at the RIGHT time, even if it is ot the time that we WANTED HIM to come. *sighs* OKAY. Then there were my guy issues....X0 (This is my screaming dramatically face.) El.oh.el. I met a cool guy, who is a #lowkey freak, a guy I was talking to I found to be CARAZY, and I told my ex how I still have feelings for him, but he brushed it off. SMH. I just need a BREAK. So I've been turning my phone off more, so I can disconnect myself from people. It's pretty helpful. It's been working so far. El.oh.el. WELP...that's the gist of it all.
Until next time...and I PROMISE that I won't way FOREVER to blog again. :-)

Making Memories

I first want to start off by saying :HAPPY NEW YEAR'S!!! El.oh.el. This is my first post of the year, though I was tempted a few times by the foolishness that went on before the year ended, (the new JORDAN'S coming out.) SMH. ANYWAYS. So yesterday...well the day BEFORE yesterday, (This post is a day late. I got distracted.), I was talking with my bestie, and somehow we got on the fact that I had been going to the same school as my "Twin" since middle school, but we didn't meet until senior year of high school. SMH. It sounds horrible, but...IT HAPPENS. And earlier that day, my mom asked me to transfer some of our VHS Home Videos into DVDs, and I was like sure. So the NEXT day...YESTERDAY, I pull out all these old videos so I can transfer, and then I pulled out my yearbooks to see if I could find any signs of my twin. When I sat down and turned on the t.v. to look at these Home Videos, I started to feel tingly on the inside. El.oh.el. Like I literally was gonna cry after seeing some of them. It just made me think. Like...time passes by SO FAST. Like one minute you're getting ready to go to kindergarten, and the next minute you're graduating from college. And then when I started to look in my yearbooks, I was amazed. 1. Because I hadn't looked at them in a while, but 2. It was crazy to see how much everyone had changed over the years. I mean...I like to see people grow. I like to see how people transform over the years. Like you think about when you are in school and what you and your friends are gonna do like when you leave high school, and then you see them later on and they are totally different, or they are doing big things with their lives. *pauses* Things like that amazes me. *sighs* I guess what i'm trying to say is that we should try to make memories starting NOW. You never know what can happen in your or someone close to you life, so it's nice to have those great memories that you guys shared. I mean...I got a digital camera for Christmas, and i'm ready to take pictures of me and my friends. I'm gonna take pictures of EVERYTHING. El.oh.el. I want to remember these years. These are the GOOD YEARS. I'M LOVING IT! El.oh.el. SO...for this NEW YEAR, we should all make memories. let this year be a GREAT YEAR. HAVE FUN!!! El.oh.el. So go out and MAKE MEMORIES!!! El.oh.el. You'll be happy you did.

Until next time

New Beginnings

I know I haven't blogged in some time, but since it's close to the end of the year, I just HAVE to blog before the NEW YEAR. *sighs* OKAY...since it's almost NEW YEARS, it's only right to recap this year and to get ready for 2012. This year has been pretty great. Well...REALLY great. I have nothing to complain about. I'm healthy, FABULOUS, el.oh.el., a sophomore in college, doing well in school, and all that other good stuff. I also learned a lot about myself. And of course I'm still learning. I mean...I'M ONLY 19 YEARS OLD!!! El.oh.el. There's A LOT more that I have to learn. I had a great boyfriend. I lost a great boyfriend. I met some crappy guys. I made some lifelong friends. I learned about some people that I thought were close to me, but...YEAH. I'm ACCEPTING the fact that I'll be turning...*inhales and exhales*...20. *sighs* SEE...THAT'S PROGRESS. El.oh.el. I'm maturing, but not letting go of my fun-loving youthful side. I'm not quite ready to turn in my "O YEAH...I'M YOUNG" card. El.oh.el. I am looking to the future though. 2012 is gonna be EVEN BETTER, and I can't wait. NOW...for these people with these New Years resolutions. I've never really been big on that sort of thing. I think if you need to make a change in your life, you should go ahead and make that change. Don't wait until New Years. DON'T PROCRASTINATE. You know how the saying goes: "Procrastination is like  masturbation. You're screwing yourself." BESIDES...who cares what you plan on doing in the new year...JUST DO IT. Especially when you know that one person who makes a New Years resolution EVERY YEAR , but they NEVER do anything about it. ...REALLY?!  Don't talk about it. Just do it. Remember these tips for the New Year, they can come in handy. So reflect on this year and get ready for the new year.
-See you guys in 2012(unless I log in before then.)

Recognize the Signs

OKAY...so Finals are here, well...WERE here. Ummm... I'm writing this blog a LITTLE late. SMH. Eloh.el.  SO...ANYWAYZ. Since it WAS like the ending of the semester, I wanted to hang with some of my friends before we got out for break; one in particular was my friend J.B. He is a GREAT friend, and I hvn't really had the chance to hangout as much this semester, because of our schedules, so I thought this would be the PERFECT time. I didn't just want to hangout for like a few hours, I decided that I wanted to spend the night at his apartment. ...YEAH...I KNOW. It kinda sounds like a BAD IDEA, but I wasn't thinking that at the time. I just really wanted to spend time with him...SO I DID. But on my way to his apartment, I experienced some signs that I SHOULDNT'VE been there. *sighs* OKAY. So I was hanging ot with my girls. We were having a good time laughing, talking, and chilling, before we got out for break. Around midnight, I left the fun to go hangout with J.B. When I got in my car, I accidentally let down my window, and when I tried to let it back up, it wouldn't. SMH. (SIGN #1) I tried EVERYTHING, but none of that worked. I just decided to drive on, and graually let up the window that way. I ended up having to circle his apartment TWICE before the window went all the way up. Now that was done with, I had to find a parking space, but there was nowhere to park. (SIGN #2) UGH. After about 10 minutes, I finally found what I THOUGHT was a good parking space, so I just left my car there and went inside.  When I opened the door, I was greeted by like 7 guys playing cards in the living room area. *pauses* AWKWARD. El.oh.el. (SIGN#3) I just went in his room and waited for him to come in  there. While I was getting things situated, he appeared behind me. I was happy to see him. :-) El.oh.el. We hungout and just chilled. It was a GREAT night. *sighs* So the next morning, I woke up a little early so I could study for my exam that I had at noon. I got my studying done, and then it was time for me to go take my exam. He walked me to my car, but that was because I made him. El.oh.el. So we're walking out to my car, and I don't see it. I was FREAKING OUT. When I got closer, my car was DEFINETLY not there. The lady in the restaurant nearby, walked out with a business card, and she told me that my car had been towed. R U KIDDING ME?!?! I was crying. J.B. tried to comfort me. SMH. It was a POOR attempt, but I appreciated it. It didn't matter tho, cuz I was still upset. I had an exam to take in like 40 minutes, and it was on the other side of the school. UGH. And then I had no car. I called the towing people to find out the information on my car, and they said it would cost $133.00. ...Ummm...EXCUSE ME??? I was like so...UGH. i just decide to leave. My exam was about to start, and I needed to stop some places before I went to take my exam. SMH. Everything ended up going well. I did a nice job on my exam, I got my car, and all the other stuff I had to do. But...the whole situation had me thinking. Like...I didn't want to do that anymore; hanging out like that. All those signs, and Ididn't recognize them. I wasn't supposed to be there, but I was trying to do my own things. I am a believer that GOD sends speaks to us through signs and stuff like that when he wants us to know something, but it is up to US to listen to them, and I DEFINETLY ignored these signs. SMH. I just hope the next time I am able to recognize the signs before something as bad or even worse than getting my car towed happens. This was definetly one of those life lessons type deals. It helped me to see what's right for me right now, and what I should be doing, and who I should be with. I just hope it doesn't happen again. Well...
UNTIL NEXT TIME.

SO That's All You Want From ME?!?!

I've always heard people say "All guys want one thing" (not to ME, but on t.v. and stuff. El.oh.el.), but I never really paid much attention to that. My ex and I broke up like 5 months ago, and I really want to start back with a relationship. Especially since I'll be turning 20 soon, which is making me feel HECKA OLD. I just feel like I should start getting my life and stuff in order. You know...like a career, relationship, and all that stuff. Basically I'm going through a mid, MID-life crisis. El.oh.el. So I've been talking to a few guys, well...they started talking to me, and it's been going good. But of course that only lasts so long. *rolls eyes* I recently found out that all the guys that was talking to me, only wanted one thing:SEX. *rolls eyes again* UGH. Like where do I have to go to find a guy who's BOYFRIEND material, someone who doesn't want that from me, and isn't HARASSING me to get it. Like what the flip is wrong with these guys??? Like I don't know what they're USED TO, but I'm not girl that they are looking for, and they're DEFINETLEY NOT the guys for me. *sighs* Like why is this so hard?!?! :-( I mean...I'm not DESPERATE or anything. I'm not thinking that every guy I see is gonna be "THAT ONE." It's just...eye.dee.kay. It just takes time I guess. When it happens...it will happen. I just can't force anything...no matter how FRUSTRATING it gets. And it most certainly gets frustrating. *sighs* Well until next time....

Like A Virgin

SO...I knew that I wanted my next post to be about sex, but I didn't know exactly what I wanted to write about...until last night. So one of the guys that I talk to, txt me and told me to come out to his car. Of course I said sure. I hadn't seen him in a while and I wanted to hang out with him. I went out to his car, and we were just sitting back talking. Then randomly while I was laying on him, he asked me..."Are you a virgin?" When I told him YEAH, his face looked like this: 0_o El.oh.el. He was SO AMAZED. I personally didn't think it was that amazing, but he said that he hadn't heard of one since his sophomore year of high school. (He made it seem like I was some kind of an alien.) SMH. But I thought that was really sad. I was literally like REALLY dude?!?! Then he asked me the infamous question, "Why are you still a virgin???" (If I could only count how many times I've been asked that.) SMH. I explained my reasoning behind this, and he really didn't seem to understand. He paused for a good little while. I knew he was in deep thought, so I asked him what it was that he was thinking about. He started to ask me some questions. He basically wanted to know what it is that I do since I don't have sex. I told him that I wasn't a nun. El.oh.el. I'm pretty sure that was what he was thinking. The whole situation was just pretty uncomfortable. I really felt like I had just told him I didn't celebrate Christmas or something. Like he had me feeling like some kind of foreigner. SMH. I didn't think it was THAT serious. But I just want to know what people who AREN'T virgins, think about people who ARE. Mainly girls, because I personally haven't heard of any guys being virgins at my age, 19. #justsaying I just wonder what people think of when they hear of someone being a virgin. Like what do they expect virgins to look like; how do they expect them to act??? Hmmm...well I can't answer that question, but maybe someone else can.

Until next time...

When You Grow Up

During the holidays, families tend to visit one another. Since my family generally lives in the same area, we OF COURSE see each other EVERY holiday. But just like a lot of families, there are those CERTAIN family members that you aren't exactly anxious to see. Well...I always tend to end up at these people's house, and let me tell you...NOT A FAN. SMH. I absolutely DESPISE going over there. It's so...so...UGH. El.oh.el. But more than anything, the person that I really just DON'T LIKE SEEING, is my aunt(by marriage; thank GOODNESS.) She is such a SLOB. But when we visited for Thanksgiving, she was EXTRA SLOBISH. Things were OKAY at first, but then she started to drink, and well...that never ends well for ANYONE. but the whole time I saw her acting a TOTAL and UTTER FOOL, I was thinking like, HOE...you are TOO OLD to be acting like this. She is like in her early 40s with 3 kids, 2 of which are teenagers. She's been in school since I was born and eye.dee.kay where she works. Honestly don't care. But I'm just like, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE?!?! I DON'T UNDERSTAND. Though I was focused only on my aunt, by marriage el.oh.el., at that time, I do realize that there are other people who havn't yet gotten the concept of growing up. We may not want to accept it, but there does come a time when we should start to act a little bit more mature, so SUCK IT UP!!! GEESH. I'm only 19, 5 months away from being 20, and I am already feeling pressure to grow up. It HAS to happen. I mean...just because you're growing up, doesn't mean it's the END OF THE WORLD. You're just moving on in life. I mean...if you're the same exact person that you were when you were in high schooll or college, and you're like 40 with kids *coughs*, THAT'S A PROBLEM. LET IT GO. Stop holding on to things of the past. This is a new time; probably a new decade. El.oh.el. Just remember that when you get to acting REAL CRAZY and the peop,e around you are looking crazy. It's not because you're funny, but because you're a sad, SAD case.
Until next...HAPPY HOLIDAYS